Archive for March, 2006

WIN A FREE DVD! Act now! Don’t delay! Or concern yourself with the fact that the DVD sucks dog turds!

Friday, March 31st, 2006

While I’m working on all this website fixorama, I figured I’d go ahead and post this. A few weeks ago, we decided to treat Nicolaus to a movie. We have an old book of Disney’s The Jungle Book, so we were going to get the DVD of the movie. Except you know what? You totally [...]

Hey, remember that time…

Thursday, March 30th, 2006

Hey! Remember that time when that hacker mother fucker stopped fucking his mother just long enough to hack into my site and fuck around with a bunch of stuff? Maybe my site reminded him of his mother, I don’t know.
Well I’m slowly putting everything back. And, probably I had bigger things to worry about fixing [...]

Car talk

Wednesday, March 29th, 2006

“Did you choose me?”
“What’s that?”
“You and daddy. Did y’all… choose me?”
“What do you mean?”
“Like how people choose tings. Did y’all choose me?”
No, kiddo, we were just very very lucky. Unless – there wasn’t one available just like you that maybe like… slept a little more? No? Okay well forget I said anything. We definitely definitely [...]

Stop what you’re doing, and go dye your hair! It’s like eating sunshine!

Sunday, March 26th, 2006

DONE. Ha! In your face, Puritan jerk baby! I only had to dive out of the bathtub and get purple dye all over the floor and leave a frantic trail of naked wet footprints between the bathtub and his cradle one time during the whole deal. My fault for not realizing that there was now [...]

Half of my hair is blonde

Sunday, March 26th, 2006

Graham’s asleep on my lap, and half of my hair is a very brassy blonde. I know what I said about him being wonderful, but all babies are sometimes jerks. I think I’ve said this before but I really want to call the police sometime and say, “Yeah my son is here. He won’t leave. [...]