Graham’s tantrums

If I say a terrible thing like, “No, you can’t have any candy right now…” he climbs on the couch next to me and flops around and sighs dramatically and kicks and hits me but very gently, so that it takes me a minute to even realize what he’s doing. If I ignore his obvious outrage, he points at me and yells “EXIT!!!”

What?

He wants me to exit. Because of what I said.

And lately whenever Nicolaus makes him mad I hear Graham scream, “YOU’RE FIRED, Nicolaus! You are BELIEVED OF DUTY.”

He means relieved. And for whatever reason, that makes Nicolaus cry.

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11 Responses to “Graham’s tantrums”

  1. Kristine Says:

    Ahhh, just make sure you keep his hair in check, lest he become the next Donald Trump!

  2. Squirl Says:

    I’m going to have to use believed of duty. That’s a good one. Wonder why Nicolaus cries over it? The exit is pretty freakin’ funny, too. :-)

  3. JRC Says:

    I love kid-use of words and expressions. My current favorites from our three year old:

    Arf = art
    Brown hog = ground hog

    I never correct these “mistakes.” I encourage them :)

  4. elaina Says:

    I love kid language as well. I’m sad that my ten year old has pretty much grown out of it. She always loved doing “arts and craps” at the kitchen table. She called cockroaches “coke-crotches.” She ate “kep-utch” with her french fries. She is slightly annoyed that her father and I insist on still using those terms. I have tried to explain that my sole purpose of existence is to embarrass and annoy her.

  5. sheetal Says:

    What a great funny to read before bed.

  6. winecat Says:

    I’ve always wondered where kids pick up their language. It must be very intimating to be told to EXIT by a 3 year old LOL

  7. Squirl Says:

    Happy Birthday to a very special little boy! :-)

  8. largirl Says:

    Cutest. Kids. EVER!!!!

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  10. Patti Says:

    akin to “Believed Of Duty”:

    My nieces (6 & 4) are rarely allowed to eat candy, so when they arrived home with their Halloween bonanza they immediately started to dig in with wild abandon. My sister-in-law, Gina, put the brakes on the sugar buffet by saying, “Whoa – you girls have to use moderation with this!”

    The next day Gina was near the girls’ bedroom and heard them arguing about something, and as she got within earshot she heard the older one scold the younger one by saying, “you have to use Mama-Ration” with that!”

  11. andrea Says:

    Holy shit you’re a hoot!
    My 3 yr old daughter totally says “you’re fired” too, but then she says “POOF!”. Thats me being set on, you guessed it, fire.

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